A recurring theme in our home is anxiety, and it’s clear that anxiety is a common challenge faced by many families. It can impact our daily lives and the whole family’s overall well-being. As parents, we have to learn how to support and guide our children.

Here’s a few of the things we’ve learnt and are still learning with our children.

• We need to create a safe and supportive environment. It’s important that we have open communication, this means our children can share their worries and fears. We encourage them to share their thoughts and try not to speak too quickly. We ask lots of non-judgemental questions and reflect back what they have told us. We want them to know they’re heard and taken seriously.
• We’ve realised that we needed to educate ourselves about anxiety. Don’t assume you understand, as I’ve said before there are lots of helpful YouTube videos about it. Don’t just watch the clinicians but listen to the people who have struggled with anxiety, even if it feels like they don’t have any solutions. It will help you to know what your child could be going through and not able to express.
• Learn some relaxation and grounding techniques. We’ve found helping our child to focus on something specific. E.g. Name five Marvel superheroes. What’s one thing you can hear, smell, see, touch and taste? Describe your funniest moment in my little pony/ninjago/how to train your dragon etc. All these are good ways to calm down their breathing if they’re having a panic attack or at bedtime if they’re worrying. It also means we can get regulated before we discuss what is causing the anxiety. A relaxation technique we use at bedtime is when they’re lying in bed, to imagine themselves saying goodnight to each part of their body, starting at their toes and working their way up. Both of these have been a good way to stop anxiety at bedtime about the next day.
• Equipping our children with coping strategies when they’re away from home is important and a big part of that is an active lifestyle. Exercise is so important, it helps to release endorphins or if not exercise, then finding a hobby they get joy from (the trampoline was great for this). Through these things, they’ll also learn some problem-solving skills.
• Encouraging positive self-talk is really important. We can do this by modelling it for them. But also when our children are in a heightened state, we speak positively to them and don’t let them say they can’t do anything or they will always be this way.
• We’ve worked at creating predictable routines. As I’ve mentioned before, food is a big deal in our house and so we have a chalkboard with the meal plan written on. Before the weekends, we lay out the plan for the days. Even if the plan is to stay home and relax. If there’s going to be any change, we make sure we give enough notice and if we can’t, we factor in some time to be upset before we need to get out of the house. We’ve found that predictability helps reduce uncertainty, a common trigger for anxiety.
• This one can be a challenge, but promoting a healthy lifestyle really supports our children’s overall well-being. This means a good amount of sleep, healthy meals, regular exercise and a good self-care routine. Sometimes this means ensuring food isn’t being hoarded in bedrooms and trying to get some fruits and veggies in their diet!
• Lastly, if you’re still finding your child/children are struggling then seek professional support. There’s no shame in saying you need help and it could make a real difference.

Our experience has been anxiety can be intense for a season and then pass. So we try to make sure we’re preparing them outside of these difficult seasons. This way when anxiety hits the tools are already in place and familiar.